Reunion

   For two successive weekends this summer, we attended my wife's family reunions--one on her Mum's side, the Vermues, and, the following weekend, the Buren reunion, on her Dad's side.
   If you enjoy large groups of Dutch people (and I do!), then you would have been in heaven, at either one of them. Both of Doralyn's parents were from large families so you end up with a huge collection of aunts and uncles, their spouses and, by default, all of their children and their grandchildren. As a group, I have always found them to be extremely engaging, friendly and loving.
   At the same time, these reunions are a bit of a stressor because I can't remember names!

   Well, actually, remembering the names isn't hard, it's applying the correct names to the correct faces which I find sometimes challenging. What makes this all the more difficult, of course, is that for the most part, these are people I only get to see once a year, if that often. So, over the course of the get-together, I will get all the names and faces properly allocated but then, a year later, it's all been lost in the breeze again!
   What makes this even worse is that more than once I've referred to the same aunt by a totally different aunt's name...right to her face! This, of course, is something I find totally mortifying and only leads me further down the path toward face-and-name performance anxiety. In turn, this has led to a lot of hi, how are you, good to see you again in an effort to greet people without using their names.
   One of the things I need to remember, though, is that I am not the only one at these family get-togethers with this same problem. As an example, shortly after we arrived at the Vermue reunion, one of Doralyn's aunts came up to me and promptly referred to me by Doralyn's ex-husband's name! This amused me to no end but I'm sure it put a damper on the poor aunt's reunion. I guess it just reinforced the fact that we're all in this together and if I wasn't overly upset at someone mixing up my name then no one else likely is too offended either.
   My family has never had reunions and it wasn't until I was married the first time that I had ever attended one. It wasn't until I was married the second time that I attended them on any kind of a regular basis. If you are new to a particular family and their reunions, they are somewhat similar to reading a novel with many characters. The author or narrator introduces you to each character one by one and attempts to explain to you where and how that character fits into the grand scheme of things. You find out about dedication, accomplishments, turmoil, true love, inspiration and a whole host of amazing sub plots as you're taken deeper and deeper into the heart of a novel called Family.
   Of course, as time progresses, you yourself become a character in the novel and are no longer just the interested reader. The things you say and the things you do all leave their own impressions on other members of the family and you begin to make your own niche. I have always enjoyed having my feet firmly planted on middle ground wherever my travels have taken me and the family milieu is not a bad place to do this.
   This, of course, will not help me remember names...