Hypocrisy

   I attended a funeral the other day. It was a fairly standard sort of affair, a United Church minister officiated and the funeral itself was for another minister. There were Bible passages read and alluded to and prayers said. I listened to the readings attentively and bowed my head during the moments of prayer.
   At the end of the service, the friend I was sitting beside asked me how I felt about all of this, seeing as how she was aware that I didn't believe in God. I suggested to her that this might be a good blog topic and this has led us to where we are now.
   This is not the first time I have been asked this question but it is the first time I have been asked by someone other than myself.
   I do give myself a little flak for participating in religious ceremonies such as weddings and funerals. I attended a candlelight service this past Christmas Eve and I argued with myself the whole time. I argued with myself before, during and after the service but, at the same time, I understood the process I was engaged in.
   It's a process called getting along with your friends and loved ones.
   In a world where you sometimes need to pick and choose your battles, there is sometimes room for accommodating people important to you. In a perfect world, your friends and loved ones will already be aware of your thoughts on such matters and will appreciate the fact that you might be sacrificing a small morsel of your principles in order to join in with them.
   That being said, I still feel hypocritical sometimes.
   Part of this feeling stems from the fact that I do spend a little of my time scrutinizing people who practise their faith religiously. I find myself looking for inconsistencies and motivation and contradictions with what they think, do and say. I'm not really sure why I do this. I'm not really sure why I pick out the religiously fervent when there are all sorts of other groups or individuals who are seemingly inexplicably driven by their beliefs, as well.
   The difference might be that religiously fervent people are involved in a process which has them engaging in all sorts of ritualistic behaviour, policies, guidance and decision-making  based on an unwavering faith in unseen forces, invisible and unprovable deities, and word-of-mouth ancient legends. I find it impossible not to scrutinize this, just a touch.
   The very faithful set a high bar for themselves. I am not a theologian in any way, but even my basic understanding of some of the tenets of different religions around the world tells me that it would be very difficult to faithfully live up to any of them, on a regular basis. This, then, opens up even more reason for scrutiny as you occasionally seem to come across people engaged in behaviour which runs contradictory to the stated beliefs of their religions. This just seems hypocritical to me.
   Is it any less hypocritical for me, then, to do the reverse, to  observe religious practices and to visit places of worship in which I have no belief? It is times like this when all the self-argument starts.
   Had I not been so clear about my disbelief in God and lack of faith in organized religion so often in past blog posts then my friend in the funeral home would not even have thought to ask me how I felt about participating in that service. Because I have been so clear on this issue, though, she must have felt as though questioning me about this was equitable and fair. I cannot and would not argue with her. If I am going to feel enabled to speak out then I must be prepared to engage them that hear me. 
   In the same way, I am spurred on to question the vocal faithful, the ones who praise their deities openly and freely, even more than I might question the ones who go about their faith silently yet demonstratively. Perhaps it is because they seem so willing to engage.
   Whenever I do a blog post of any kind, I like to include a picture or two, for visual appeal. Tonight I went to Google Images and simply typed in "religious hypocrisy". More than any other image search I can remember doing, I was assailed by the sheer anger many of the pictures portrayed. The topic is clearly controversial, heartfelt and, apparently, simmers within large portions of the population. Frankly, I felt that posting many of them here would have tainted the issue I was trying to present. I went back and omitted the word "religious" and got what seemed like a much calmer response. This obviously tells you something.
   Whether at some point I might change my personal policy about participating in religious services is up in the air. I am not against standing up for what I believe in but, at the same time, if my mere presence and participation in some form of service will add to the collective ability to assuage people who desperately need it then I can only see myself continuing to do this.
   This being said, though, now that I know that I am occasionally being listened to I may have to start walking the walk.