Pointing

   I was at a BBQ with my family just recently and my youngest stepson became engaged in an extremely mild....well, for the lack of a better word...tantrum.
   He was in the middle of an exchange with Doralyn when, all of the sudden, he pointed a finger at her. I think he might even have actually touched her with it.

   I feel strongly about finger-pointing, of the literal variety, and having anyone point a finger at my wife or perhaps even poke her with it elicits a strong response. So I was very briefly all over my stepson and that was the end of it. The finger-pointing part, anyway.
   There is something about an angry interaction between two people which eventually escalates into either one or both of them pointing the finger. It is almost as if all the pent up hostility funnels down to one narrow, almost-rifled aperture. The words have become almost useless and the pointed finger has taken over.
   I am as prone as the next person to using a pointed finger. It is almost as if I'm saying I'm really angry and right now all that anger is pointed directly at YOU!

Aahhh, if only to have this power...

   Generally, when I have sunk to the level of pointing my finger at someone during a heated exchange, my mind is engaged in either one or both of two thought processes; either I am right or I am the boss. This is rather ironic, as I only ever actually think I'm right and I'm almost never actually the boss but my mind works in funny ways sometimes.
   I was engaged in an exchange once with someone who was angrier than I was when, in the middle of it, he pointed his finger at me. And then cocked the trigger of his imaginary gun. This had taken finger-pointing to a whole new, imaginarily-lethal, level. I did what I usually do--I pointed my finger back at him, thereby creating a "standoff". Fortunately, no-one was hurt.
   I occasionally use my pointed finger for less conflict-related issues. Often, I find myself looking for someone in particular out of a crowd of people. When I find that person, I point. I then turn my hand over and slowly make the beckoning gesture. And, magically, they rise and follow. At other times, I can be passing someone at a distance, see them, and simply point and smile. Often, they simply point back. In this way, we have had a brief, yet somehow viable, conversation. I often point, in a congratulatory way, to guys who've made good plays on the ball hockey floor. Saves the voice, really. Athletes will often point skyward after a great play, apparently in praise of the god that gave them this ability. I am waiting for the athlete who, after making a horrendous play, also points skyward. Only seems appropriate...


"HE did it!" "No, HE did it!"

   I haven't even touched on finger-pointing of the non-literal variety; the blame-laying and whistle-blowing. I purposely have not done this because it really has nothing to do with...well...your finger. Perhaps another day and another blog.
   Now, I hope after all this you don't have the impression I'm a finger-pointing hothead. Far from it, if anything I'm probably too passive. That's why, when you reach the finger-pointing stage with me, you've probably strayed just a touch. So WATCH IT!!